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Post by nessa2406 on Mar 17, 2014 9:56:28 GMT 12
hi ive just recently had a baby hes now 10 weeks old and ever since hes been born ive felt so down and alone. His birth was natural and everything but pretty much as soon as i had him i got discharged because i wanted to be at home once i got home i had so many visitors and started feeling like he wasnt mine as i never got much time with him that day but i was so tired and sore. i got told it was just baby blues and it would be like that for a few days but now its been 10 weeks i thought it would be gone by now but its gotten worse. my baby has reflux so all he does is cry and cry and ive been to doctors and hes now on different formula but i cant do much as i always with him and cant take him out as all he does is cry. ive got alot of support from my family and friends but still feel so alone. my boyfriend is great support hes always there for himeven know hes not his dad he still acts like thats his son. my babys real dad left me when i was 13 weeks pregnant and ive been so alone since then he hasnt even got in contact to come and meet him. every time im by myself with him is cry and i want it to stop and go away. recently my bfs mum died so hes gone away for a couple of weeks to be with his family i wanted to tell him how im feeling but i know its not the right time i need to be strong and be there for him bt dont know how when i cant be strong for myself . i love my son so much but i just feel so lost :/
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Post by Kia on Mar 17, 2014 20:08:31 GMT 12
Hey Nessa, I'm so glad you have been brave and opened up on this forum. That's a tough thing to do I know. Everything will still feel new but 10 weeks is getting on for quite a long time to be feeling so low. It's unlikely to 'just be the baby blues'... Sounds like these feelings may not just go away on their own, but please don't despair. Having a baby is a huge upheaval on you, physically, mentally and emotionally. And post natal depression and anxiety are very common... And temporary and treatable with the right help. Are you able to speak with your GP about how you have been feeling? I'd really encourage that if you can. And if you don't have a sympathetic GP or one that tries to fob you off (unfortunately it can happen) then please see another one. Depending on where you live there may also be a dedicated PND support group that meets regularly, and though that can seem a bit scary at first, it can really help to speak with other mums who are going through what you are. There is nobody who understands this better than someone else who has been there and got the t-shirt. It was probably the most isolating times of my entire life, and the emptiness, anxiety, irritability, rage and sadness I felt just did not make sense. Because I also knew I loved my daughter fiercely... You see it's not you though... It's the illness that switches on that invasive negative voice or feeling which starts to filter through every fibre of your being, and it gets so hard to try and switch it off. Please seek professional support honey and know for a start, that you are not alone. It can feel like a real tough slog, but you are doing it. Every day you are achieving lots of small steps and little victories. You are doing so so well I promise. Let us know how you are getting on soon and remember that it is more than ok to take time out to care for yourself. Necessary in fact. Take care and hugs to you ((((((((o))))))))) Kia xxx P.s. Check out the other thread on reflux and sleeping issues, might be some useful tips for you and bubs there? X pni.org.nz/post/56/thread |
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Post by Kia on Mar 23, 2014 19:05:11 GMT 12
How are you Nessa? x
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Post by Kat on Apr 1, 2014 10:11:44 GMT 12
Total hugs to you Nessa  I hope you do follow Kia's advice - talking to my GP and psychologist are the only reasons I got through after the birth of my daughter. I've been on anti-depressants since about a week after she was born (and she's now 15 months old). I can totally relate to the alone-ness that you are describing. I just cried and cried and cried for weeks after my daughter was born. I had my mum and sister around almost every day but I just felt so alone. I mean the word loneliness doesn't even begin to describe the depth of the feeling. It's super awful. But please hang on honey. Just keep talking to professionals until you find one that listens and understands, and can help you. And keep talking to Kia on here - she is super great. XXX |
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Post by Kia on May 4, 2014 20:06:30 GMT 12
I hope things are improving for you Nessa, and that you are getting the support you need. Please come back and vent to us here if you need it. Take care, Kia x
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